At the end of the day, aren’t we all just trying to matter?
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It’s the single most important question of every man’s life. And, it’s imperative that you know the answer.
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No matter how you slice it, men today are lonelier than ever. The pressure of work, marriage and trying to be the “Dadliest Dad” on the planet are fueling an epidemic of loneliness.
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In pre-modern times people died early and often. The infrequency of death today makes it’s occurrence unfamiliar and uncomfortable. That’s why talking about death is disquieting for us. It’s wholly unfamiliar to us.
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The simple truth about men is that our thoughts are not that complex. Most men aren’t thinking about other women or nuclear fusion or how to cure pancreatic Cancer. Okay, then what are they thinking about?
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Prior to the pandemic, 60% of all employees were working on-site. Then the pandemic lockdowns forced everyone to convert their breakfast table from Snack, Crackle and Pop to Zoom, Teams and Meet.
Just a few years later, only 20% of employees work on-site, while 29% are fully remote. It’s convenient, but survey data is beginning to suggest that all is not well…
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Quick question: What demographic in America has the highest suicide rate? It’s the angsty teens and their social media addiction, right? Wrong. Could it be those middle-aged millennials (25-44)? Nope. So, which is it? You’ll have to read or listen to find out.
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I think we can all agree that the goal during our time on Earth is to thrive, so that at the end of the road, we are full of memories and experiences that leave us satisfied with the journey, right?
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There are instances when worrying can be constructive. I call it “constructive anxiety.” For example, it can help you prepare for something important, like delivering a speech in front of a large audience. But, for the most part, worrying is a complete waste of time.
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Most people think that being rich and famous will make them happy. A lifetime of eternal bliss. An opportunity to finally enjoy the “good life”. The problem with being rich & famous is that it’s still you. It’s still you with all your doubts and fears and regrets and insecurities. It’s still you, you’re just riding on a private jet like Elon Musk. But, at 41,000 feet Elon Musk is still wondering where he went wrong with kid number six of nine.
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Regret is a cognitive emotional state that involves blaming ourselves for a bad outcome. Like putting hot cheese and chili on your roller-grill hot dog at QT. That’s almost guaranteed to lead to regret.
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As we approach Independence Day we are seeing a rising level of, well, independence. And, a sense that people are abandoning our long-held values. Values like patriotism, family and organized religion. But, there is one thing that is skyrocketing in popularity.
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In times of despair it’s important to know that everyone struggles through difficult life experiences. Everyone. Life isn’t about avoiding struggle. It’s about how we see those challenges and our ability to come back stronger, wiser. As the saying goes, nobody gets out of here alive. Nobody.
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Only 21% of parents say it’s extremely or very important for their children to get married. Shockingly, almost half of parents say it’s not important at all. So, what happened to the American dream?
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I believe that most people in this country are good people. I believe that most people in this country are kind. And, that we are the friendliest and most generous country on earth. But, every once in a while we run into Ass-Clowns. You know, those people that enjoy making an ass of themselves? These kind of people can lead you to believe that the world has changed; has become less friendly and more self serving. It hasn’t.
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Friar Richard Rohr is an American author, spiritual writer, and Franciscan Friar based in Albuquerque, New Mexico. He authored a human developmental theory into three stages called Order, Disorder and Re-order. It mirrors the parable in many ways.
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People who learn to manage their need for immediate gratification will thrive more in their careers, relationships, health, and fitness. But, it’s hard. We aren’t wired to delay our gratification.
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